Sharing a wonderful blog

I have taught so many children over the 17 years with so many different diagnoses and levels of health and abilities. I am always reminded of the story "Welcome to Holland" by Emily Perl Kingsley which compares the arrival of a child with a disability to making plans to take a vacation to Italy and being told when your plan lands "Welcome to Holland."
Most families are extremely lucky to never experience Holland like this mother describes. In my family, we have had a couple of incidents, one 2nd cousin with Down's Syndrome & a 3rd cousin born completely blind. Michael's family had a recent experience with the loss of a baby by the name of Maggie who was a distant cousin. Maggie's parents kept a blog describing their journey through pregnancy, diagnosis of Maggie, Maggie's birth, and the passing of Maggie. Joy, Maggie's mother, recently posted her views on healing. She & Stephen are so eloquent in their pain. Throughout their journey, they have never lost sight of the big picture - God is in control. I hope you will enjoy their story as much as I have.

Our baby girl

Coupons????

Am I extreme couponing?

I wouldn't say extreme couponing. I'm just saving money. I won't go to a bunch of stores. I went to two stores yesterday - Wal-Mart & Tom Thumb. I'm using some apps that give digital coupons & one that helps me track the paper ones. But I only buy what I need. I used shortcuts.com yesterday and saved $3.25. Also, cellfire allows you to add more savings to your reward cards. I actually saved over $20 @ Tom Thumb! It's a little exciting!

I had to buy a new smoke/CO² detector for $38 and in a roundabout way it was free because of my savings yesterday. I was excited; Michael thought I was a little crazy but if it works... I'm also going to keep close track of my savings using Quicken.

You know what they say “Curiosity killed the cat - satisfaction brought him back!”

Oh, yeah - don't forget to go to the manufacturer's websites and like them on FB because they have some coupons there that are exclusive.

I set up a 2^nd email account just for coupons & sales. This way I can sign up for any website and not worry about junk mail as much because it’s just gmail and not my Windstream account. I know it’s kind of crazy but it’s the best way for me to keep my sanity when it comes to all of those emails!

A hard part for me is tracking sales. When you live in the country it’s hard to get sale ads. Plus your store choices are limited. I won’t drive to kingdom come to save money especially when gas is so expensive! I only go to Gainesville so my choices are Wal-Mart & Tom Thumb. Sometimes going to CVS can be a deal too.

One of the things I learned yesterday was in my shopping list, I need to note how many of each item has to be purchased in order to qualify for the coupon. Also, don’t give up on using a coupon. If you have to, ask to see the manager. I had a coupon for 2 free dog treats with the purchase of dog food. When I picked up the items, I read & reread the coupon to make sure I picked up the right things. When the cashier scanned the coupon, the register kept kicking it out. I asked for the CSM who read the coupon, verified my items, and gave me the $5! It was worth it!

Will I do this again?

Yes, definitely! It’s going to be hard when I’m working full-time but in the long-run it is worth it!

Last Chapter

Friday, June 3, 2011 was the closing chapter of part of my professional life. (Sounds pretty ominous, right?)

Bobby, Kaili, Munen, and I headed to the school @ 8:00 to pack up the remainder of my classroom. I wasn't sure I could do it without having a complete mental breakdown. I had been told so many lies over the last year and especially the last week that I didn't even know what I would find when I got there. I went expecting the worst. After all, I had been told that I wasn't allowed to be on campus except from 4-8 on weekdays and that the locks had been changed. Once again these were lies told to try to control me. Anyway, we brought boxes and got to work! Four hours sure didn't seem like enough when we began but we had it knocked out in 2 1/2 hours! We even had the vehicles unloaded by 11:00! It was a lot of work but it was such a stress relieving expedition!

The next step will be to purchase plastic tubs to properly store everything. We didn't worry about how anything was packed. It was get it in a box and get it home as fast as possible!

Michael's comment was simply "I hope that's all there is!" It's quite a huge stack!

I also took some time to organize my yarn stash. I am just like every other crafter in the world. (At least I hope!) I didn't realize I had so much yarn until I gathered it all together. Here's the picture:

I have now organized it into a few categories and inventoried it. There are 3 large bags under my bed, a couple of baskets in my 'craft' closet, and the scrap pieces are in the bottom of a large wooden chest. It's exciting to have it all organized and know what I have available. The sad part is... NO MORE YARN BUYING FOR A LONG TIME!!!!

I have four projects on hook and in the meantime I'll try to plan some projects for each of the yarns. Good luck, right? LOL!

Calm again

Life seems to be calm again. Last week was a difficult week since it was the week that everyone began finding out about my resignation. The comments that people have made have all been positive which is letting me know that this decision has been the right one. Even though I was not the instigator of the decision I know that it is the right one for this moment in time. It is something I've wanted to do for a while now but didn't have the guts to try it.
I have labeled my calendar to show how many days are left - 33 days.  Staying motivated every day is going to be difficult. I have had a daily schedule for so long that I don't really know how to function without one. I think I need to rely on the Flylady again. I may need to have a written schedule so that I can become more organized in my tasks as a wife & mother.
Today, I teach the Children's Theater and then we have the annual egg hunt and potluck lunch at the park. Yet once again I have forgotten to prepare anything! I will check out the pantry and hope to find SOMETHING! We will stop by the grocery store and buy a 2 liter root beer. Luckily, the Easter bunny had already purchased candy for Bobby's basket and we were able to use that candy and left over eggs so that is done. Bobby fixed those last night. He said he felt like the Easter bunny!

This week Bobby was taking achievement tests along with the other lower grades. After the first day, I asked him about his tests. He said the test was really hard. I questioned him about what was so hard and he replied "Staying in those little bubbles! It's hard trying to keep my pencil inside those little bubbles. I tried to color outside of it and then erase but that just wasn't good enough." When I questioned him about the questions he said those were easy. That evening after reading, he fell asleep for 2 hours and only woke up long enough to get ready for bed. Those bubbles are really tiring!

Difficult decision made!

Friday afternoon was a terrible day professionally speaking. I was informed that I would not be rehired for the 2011-2012 school year. I had been given two choices:

1. Turn in a resignation letter
2. Allow a non-renewal to appear on my record.

Now what do I do? I have been told that I'm not good enough to be rehired. I intended to retire from Saint Jo and one person was able to change the course of my history. I was DEVASTATED to say the least! All weekend I had to pretend everything was okay when I felt like my whole world was coming to an end. I placed a call to ATPE, told my parents, Michael, & Munen.

Michael, Bobby, & I drove to College Station for Jeffrey's wedding, which was beautiful! I did my best to hide my emotions from the other family members so that it wouldn't ruin everyone else's weekend. Success!

So now it is Sunday. My dad said to call him when we got home from the wedding and we could talk. He had lots of good questions and made me think about my options. While I was on the phone with him, the ATPE lawyer called the house. She also had wonderful questions for me!  And most especially - wonderful answers to my questions:

The final answer is that there are no options for me but to resign. However, to help me with future jobs the lawyer has some recommendations for me.

1. Email the principal in the morning confirming her intent to not rehire me. This will create a kind of paper trail that I can use to hopefully claim unemployment.
2. I will also request a meeting with her to discuss updating my PDAS to reflect my efforts to change.
3. I will turn in a resignation letter tomorrow.

I have begun to reflect on my studies of Esther from the Bible. An important verse at this time is

Esther 4:14b "And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?”

I have come to realize that God is speaking to me and I haven't been listening. He is showing me a different way to go but I have to find that way still. We all know that God shows you the way in His time not yours. So I will pray and continue to study His word. I will find the right way...it may take some time but that's what I have, right?

To all of those who have supported me through these years and this momentous decision, I would like to say Thank you! I wish I could reach out through this computer and hug your neck! I pray that you too will listen to God's word and that He will show you the way!

Love, Kirsten

Long weekend

It has been a very long weekend emotionally for me. I'm struggling at work with learning recently that the people I work with are not my friends after all. In church this morning, Curt spoke about the crazy people in your life than can cause you to make wrong decisions in you life. This applied to me so much that it was difficult to concentrate carefully but I did take notes that I will use to look over and remind myself as the weeks of this school year drag on. Unfortunately, the people at work are actually the "For Yous." These are the people in your life that you think are your friends but then you do something they don't like, they turn against you. This is how I feel right now. People that I thought I could trust to tell my secrets to have turned their backs on me. It appears they have turned around and went straight to the principal. I have been questioning myself all weekend about how to handle this.

1. Confront (which I know in my heart will only make it worse even though the temporary relief would feel so good!)
2. Ignore - I know this is the right way to go but I feel so beaten up and bruised that I "allowed" this to happen. In reality I know that I didn't cause it to happen. I didn't ask to be treated so poorly. I didn't ask to be betrayed. I'm being tested.

As Curt said this morning, the closer I come to Jesus, the more I will be tested and I have to remain strong. Look to the Bible to find out what my decision should be.
So the question is "who is my Daniel?" Who is the person I can trust to keep me from making bad decisions? Who is the person that keeps me from making CRAZY decisions? I know God is there for me and I need to listen and talk to him. I haven't been doing that enough. I trust that Michael is also my Daniel. I know he has my best interest at heart. I believe and trust in him, too.

Where's Your Daniel?

Now, back to Esther. She has been a busy woman. She has fasted and not your typical fast. She went without food and water for 3 days & nights. Usually, fasting didn't involve going without water and certainly not during the nights also! This was very dangerous for anyone, especially during the Bible times. She asked Moredecai to go out and ask the Jews to join her in this fast and then she would go before Xerxes without being summoned. So 3 days later she has dressed in her robes and gone to Xerxes. He has extended his scepter to her. She has touched the tip...
We have stopped there for a day to ponder on the picture that has been painted. This beautiful woman, who had spent THREE days without food and water, probably appeared to be tired & drawn. Her eyes were probably sunken in and had black circles. She was probably very weak and tired. But she knew that if she did nothing that not only would she die but so would her family and all the other Jews in Persia. So, a nervous young woman has dressed up in her finest and has walked countless feet to stand in front of the man that can change her life - for good or bad. And what happens, he is so taken by her beauty, "pleased with her," that he extends his scepter. AMEN! What relief she must have felt knowing that he won't kill her for coming to his presence without being summoned. But that hasn't taken away all of her stress. What will he say? What will he do? I can't wait to find out!

Tomorrow I will do my best to follow God's word and not allow other people's 'fickle friendship' affect my attitude!

I'm back

I have been studying the book of Esther in the Bible the last couple of weeks. Wow what a life this young woman has had up through chapter 4. We are using a Beth Moore book called Esther: It's Tough Being a Woman in our women's Bible study. Every Thursday, a group of around 20 women from our church and local churches gather together to watch a video of Beth Moore talking about what we learned in the previous week and what we are going to be learning in the coming week. She is a very dynamic speaker and has an amazing ability to take apart the verses so that you gain an understanding of them and then she knits (or crochets in my case) them back together so that they are meaningful. It seems that many times people will take apart portions of God's word and make it fit whatever their needs are. Beth doesn't do that. She helps you see it through His eyes and ties it to other portions of the Bible. There is no doubt in my mind that this is a God-given talent that she uses and shares with everyone. When I grow up, I want to be Beth Moore!
Each week, Beth gives us a scenario that starts with "It's tough being a woman..." This week is:

It's tough being a woman thrown a giant-sized weight.

This is what is happening to Esther in chapter 4. She has just learned of the edict ordering the death of all the Jews in Persia. Since she too is a Jew, it's reasonable to assume that she will be killed unless she as the Queen of Persia does something QUICK! I can't wait to see what she does next. Bobby told me just to read ahead and find out but I just can't do it because Beth presents each section in such a way that I believe I will understand it better if I just wait. Even though it's killing me!

So, why start this blog again? I wish I knew. I have so many friends that are struggling right now with family issues, professional issues, health issues, personal issues, etc. Sometimes I feel like I need an outlet. Maybe this form of journaling is what I need. Not only are my friends struggling, but I am too. I'm healthy and so is my family but I'm struggling with professional issues and parenting issues. Professionally, if you have watched the news in TX then you know about the possibility of huge budget cuts. No teacher is ever guaranteed their job year to year. Every year around this time, we wait to get that little letter that says the district has decided to extend our contract for another year. The sad thing is that even if you sign that contract, you are still not guaranteed a job. They can back out of it easier than we as teachers can. Sometimes I wonder why I put up with all this bureaucracy, but then I go to work the next day and see my sweet little kids faces and I remember -  I LOVE WHAT I DO!!! It's so exciting to see their faces light up when they do something for the first time or when they see their friends! I can't help but love it!
As for parenting issues, Bobby is really testing the waters the last week. He is pushing me at home and pushing his teacher at school. It's like there's a line in the sand and he's tapping it with one toe saying "What are you going to do about it? I didn't cross the line!" I don't know what to do and I feel as if his daddy doesn't even notice what's going on. I just need to remember what Angie told me - be firm, consistent, and FOLLOW-THROUGH! If  I don't get this under control at 6, things will only get worse!
So, I guess in closing I would like to say a prayer for some special people and for some unknown people. I pray that the family that is struggling with lies & rumors will turn to God for guidance and support. I know that your first instinct is to lash out but you know that isn't the right way to handle the situation. You have to be strong and reach out to God for his help. For the unknown people that are saying terrible things about this family, please repent and ask God to forgive you. Spreading rumors is hurtful and useless. You aren't hurting anyone else but yourself. That family is stronger than any horrible thing you could ever say. They have suffered through so much and have turned their lives around to be on God's side. They know that the truth will come out and that through their beliefs God will strengthen them.

Dear God,
I want to thank you for your loving words that teach us how to be more like Jesus Christ Your Son. I would like to lift a special family up tonight in my prayer. They are suffering a terrible grievance at the hand of others. I can only imagine the pain they are feeling tonight. I pray that they will feel Your loving arms surrounding them and giving them strength to make positive choices.
God, I also want to lift up those that are causing so much pain to that family. They too are suffering in a different way. They need Your help more than the family does because they don't know You! They need to come to you and learn to live in a world that doesn't have to involve hate or gossip. God, I have been that person who talks badly about others not thinking about the consequences. I'm struggling with it still today. I continue to pray for guidance in my words and actions. I pray that I can become one of those people that can be trusted to "Keep my mouth closed!" It is so hard not to get caught up in that web but I will continue to come to You through prayer and through Your word for guidance and strength.
Thank you for sending Your son to take away our sins. Thank You for loving us so much that You have it all planned out for us. How great is Your love!
In Your name I pray,
Amen

Summer KAL-CAL

What is that????? It stands for Summer Knit Along-Crochet Along. This is a sort of contest and a way to get encouragement from the crochet & knit world. Here is the link to the Summer KAL-CAL

I crochet. I tried to knit many years ago and remember feeling frustrated. About 3 years ago I decided to teach myself how to crochet and found it easy and relaxing. I started by making baby blankets for our son and then branched out. Here is a picture of my most recent completed project:

I had to start it over several times before I finally got it the width that I wanted. It's gorgeous if I do say so myself!

I also recently completed a pilloghan that I might give as a Christmas present so no picture.

I purchased some Lily Sugar N Cream yarn to complete the Cottage Bag. I started it out and didn't think I would have enough yarn. (don't you just hate that!) I started to make Small Stash Baskets but they were so small I couldn't figure out what purpose they would serve in my house. So back to the drawing board. What to do? I searched the Internet, downloaded tons of free patterns trying to decide on one. I finally decided that that was ridiculous to keep searching and not starting anything. I looked back at all of my patterns and selected...drum roll please...

 

Cottage Bag

 

So this is the pattern I will be submitting to the Summer KAL-CAL. According to the blog, I can enter more than one bag or socks. We'll see how this one goes and what time I have after school starts.

  I'm really excited about this new adventure!

Costume Play

On Friday Bobby rediscovered his Halloween costume that Othermama made! He had tons of fun playing around and making elephant sounds. Josie didn't like it but Sara could have cared less!

  Josie preparing to jump on the elephant.

 

 

Sara in her usual position.

Bobby the elephant

 

Oh yeah - here are the pictures I promised of my flowerbed (part of it)

   

 

 

and Michael's baby cradle.

 

 

These are the flowers that Bobby planted from seeds.

A little update for the week

As I mentioned in my last post, I bought some stuff for my flowerbeds that were really, really overgrown! So this week I have focused in on getting my flowerbeds back under control. The problem is the heat doesn't allow me to get outside for very long everyday. So I have been getting up every morning around 6:30 and heading outside to work until around 10:00 which is my heat limit. As of today, Wednesday, August 6, 2008, the flowerbeds are done. I had a real problem before with drainage so I'm hoping that weed stop fabric and mulch will help with that problem. I also planted 72 "monkey grass" plants which Michael says will help. It took me 3 days but I think it's worth it! I'll post a picture when I'm through watering it.

So here's a report on the menus from last week. I started off great the first two days but then I got sick and the rest is history. I am continuing the unmade recipes this week. I made Famous Pork Chops Tuesday night and we had them for leftovers tonight. This is one of Bobby's favorite meals that I make. I haven't tried the Fake 'n Bake or the 7-Up chicken yet but there is still time this week, right?

 

Pictures of the latest furniture to be added to our house.

Round Formica top table from MIL's store  

Cabinet top was MIL's paternal grandmother's

 

I just realized I didn't take a picture of the 3rd item - Michael's baby cradle. Oops!

As I close tonight I want to leave you with this - One of my dear friends from my time in Nacogdoches (love ya Gayla!) writes a wonderful blog everyday that I enjoy reading. She had a bible verse that spoke to me today and I thought I would share it with you:

I Corinthians 16:14 (The Message)

“ Keep your eyes open, …, give it all you've got, be resolute, and love without stopping.”

Bad blogger!!!

Oops! Didn't meet that goal! I've been very unmotivated and busy doing NOTHING!!! well actually, I was doing stuff. I just couldn't make myself blog about any of it.

Last week, I was sick a couple of days - may have been overheated? It is way too hot here!

We did our weekly trip to Wal-Mart Friday. We also made a stop at Home Depot to pick up some stuff to work on my flower beds.

Friday night Bobby & I went to the Saint Jo Rodeo. Man was it HOT!!

Michael had to work Saturday so Bobby and I hung around the house. We went to the rodeo parade Saturday afternoon and about melted on the sidewalk! We had tickets for Saturday's rodeo but just couldn't make ourselves sit out in that heat for 3 hours even though it was after dark.

Sunday morning Bobby and I got to go to Kaili's church to see her sing "Open the Eyes of My Heart, Lord." It was really cute and a great performance for a 5 year old. Bobby actually went to the nursery after the children's sermon. He never wants to be in there! Usually he stays with me. It was so nice to listen to the entire sermon without interruption. Don't get me wrong - I love having him with me - it was just different.

Recipes

Thank you for the suggestion Susan. I get a lot of my recipes from cdkitchen. They have loads and loads of recipes! The best part is that my husband, the brown food man, will eat most of them.

I also found the Meal Makeover Moms

Weekly Menu

Okay Simply Susan, you have inspired me - I'm going to attempt planning my menus a week at a time. Although my typical follow-through behavior, this will probably only last one week.

I’m going to try to post more often – wait a minute, that’s not an appropriate goal. I write goals all the time for my Special ed kids so let me try this again. Currently I’m not writing any posts so let’s rewrite that goal to – The student will write three posts every week with one of the posts including her weekly menu with an 80% accuracy. LOL

Monday

• Breakfast - cereal

• Lunch - Bobby will be making English Muffin Pizzas (I'll be cleaning up all afternoon but it's worth every minute!)

• Dinner - Coconut Chicken Fingers 

Tuesday

• Breakfast - Cream of wheat

• Lunch - Ravioli ("square spaghetti" as Bobby calls it)

• Dinner - All In One Spaghetti 

Wednesday

• Breakfast - Waffles

• Lunch - Bobby's pizza

• Dinner - 7-Up Chicken 

Thursday

• Breakfast - cereal

• Lunch - Mac 'n Cheese

• Dinner - Fake -n- Bake "Fried" Chicken (originally from Real Simple magazine)

Friday

• Breakfast - waffles

• Lunch - ABC spaghetti

• Dinner - Famous Pork Chops - my own recipe with cracker crumbs & eggs

Saturday

• Breakfast - French toast

• Lunch - Grilled cheese

• Dinner - We'll eat at the Saint Jo Rodeo

Sunday

• Breakfast - cream of wheat

• Lunch -  grilled cheese

• Dinner - eat out

 

BTW- Check out where I'm going in a month - Women of Faith Conference in Dallas! My friends have gone for the last couple of years and I signed up yesterday to join them this year! I can't wait!!!

 

We, meaning Michael & I, installed a new A/C window unit Friday which has helped control some of the heat in our living room. Our Brittany Spaniel, Sara, really likes it because it's nice a low where she can lay in front of it and cool off! I'll try to get a picture of her posted.

June 6, 2008

I have started this blog to give me a place to ramble about whatever I wanted to. The other blog was just for my family and found many times that I had the needed a place to write but it didn't belong on our Kaz blog. So, here I am.
I finished my first afghan tonight. It looks beautiful and I'm very proud of it.